Don’t keep naked photos on your phone.

It seems like a simple instruction to avoid all kinds of problems later, but as a person who smoked off and on and on and off and still will grab a cig if available now and then, I cannot really point fingers at all.

It would be one thing to smoke and then have a Gnome track you down and give you cancer. Then it would be best not to smoke but it would be better still to get rid of the Cancer Gnomes. Same with Porn Trolls

Like it or not, naked phone pictures are a part of the intimate and private lives of people these days and are at least as common aids in intimacy candles, Clown shoes and 24/7 loops of anteaters destroying termite mounds projected on the ceiling.

I am not a person who pays attention to celebrities. It bothers me that I pick up information on the vile Not_going_to_write_their_name_here family just by reading the news online or waiting to purchase mouthwash at Duane Reade. But that family seems to plan for the loss of privacy (I suspect their press kits include a speculum) and are probably much more worried about their depilatory budget slipping out in public than an unruly nipple or two.

Celeb Jihad is a bit different. It’s business model is to post fake nudes of celebrities interspersed with real nudes, often available from films they have done and then just enough stolen images that are real to make one wonder how many of the “fake nudes” may also be real.

Of course that is akin to having your house robbed, seeing someone wearing your Clown Shoe (don’t judge me) and claiming you had permission to use it from the owner, who stole it. Celebrity or not it is not right to have someone’s privacy put up to ridicule or other activities simply because they have been on TV or are famous.

One of my theories of Cyber Crime is that if you expose the person behind the crime, many more incidents will stop. This is because it tends to be the same people behind similar activities. Too many “Cyber Security” people will think that if you stop one, another takes it place, but without exposure to the elements and to the law they just start over again. I suspect the same is true with “PR Nightmares” so I figured I would do an experiment and try to track down the likely owner of Celeb Jihad.

—-edit—–

I succeeded in tracking down the actual owner. Nice guy it turns out. As with everything, things are not as they appear in the world of “Celebrity Hacking”. Plus people get weird. I mean really weird. Like “OMG I better call the FBI before someone gets hurt.” weird.

So, No crimes were actually committed. Think about that for a second. Because you can say things like “but wait…but what about..” Yep. No crime.

Certain people who pass my own background checks will be allowed to see my methods and results. Email me.